Kathy
My heart goes out to your family. I am so sorry for your loss. What pain hurts worse than the pain of losing someone that you love? Though the pain you're feeling must seem unbearable, please remember that you are not alone. Psalms 46:1 says, "God is our refuge and strength, a help that is readily found in times of distress." Pray to Him for strength. Weep to Him when there are no words. One of the poets of the Bible said at Psalms 56:8, "You keep track of my wandering. Do collect my tears in your skin bottle." You see, God understands your pain and He cares for you very much (1 Peter 5:7). And He will really help you get through this difficult time (Isaiah 41:10).